You’re driving into work with your mind on the proposal that’s neatly tucked away in your bag; the one you stayed up half the night preparing, the one that could have benefited from even just ten more minutes of fine-tuning, had you an ounce more energy. The snow is fiercely blowing, your eyes are red from exhaustion, and the unexpected traffic is causing you to glare resentfully at a clock that is advancing faster than usual. You switch on the radio for some solace and that’s when you hear the most horrifying sound: “Have a holly jolly Christmas; it’s the best time of the year!”
No matter what’s wrong with you, my friend, there’s more right with you than wrong.
This saying makes me laugh! (and you know how I love to laugh ;) But it's SO true! We can get so caught up in what's wrong; with ourselves, at work, with our kids, our marriage, our finances....That we forget to acknowledge all the good.
“It’s not in my job description” is a phrase you’ve probably heard many times as a leader. Whether you’ve asked a team member to cover for someone or take on a last minute assignment, “It’s not in my job description” can be a default response in the workplace.
How do you feel when you hear this? Frustrated? Exhausted? Disappointed?
Getting to a place of understanding and empathizing with your employees when they use this response will help relieve these emotions, and also allow you to communicate and approach them in a more successful way.
A nightmare about work.
A fear-based dream about your place of employment, roles and responsibilities, co-workers, clients and conflicts.
Ex. I had a workmare last night about a Nerf-gun war at work where the Nerf darts were full of truth serum. When I got hit with a Nerf bullet in my back side, I told my boss he was a bosshole!
I woke up before the end of the dream but I was sure I got fired.
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Ahh there are really great moments-- and other times life can feel overwhelming and stressful.
John, a manager wrote: ”I’m just trying to keep up with the pace and not burn my team out," he explained. "But, I’m struggling. At this level, I need more time to learn about the business and I need more time with my team. I feel as though I am not enough or I am not measuring up and that drives me nuts."
His questioning, wanting, doubting, led me to think about the challenges of having a wealth of information at our fingertips. Feeling sick? Go see Dr. Google. Missed the news? Check Facebook or Twitter. Want to make news? Social media is crowning citizens as trusted news anchors every moment of the day.
While I spend most days fasting from news, stock quotes and sports' scores, the hottest most seductive news of the day always finds me...even when I am not looking. I recognize that there is a beauty to our information age, yet I can also see how information itself can be a seductive addiction that eats up our time and energy and causes us to compare ourselves to others in fascinating ways.
During a recent coaching certification, I had an extraordinary experience practicing methods of giving feedback. Instead of creating thoughts of “you’re not good enough”, we did something different, something magical. We created a space that felt like an adventure. It was like a leadership taste-test. We reviewed the 360 feedback as though we were tasting different desserts. As we went through each bite of feedback, we ‘tasted’ each piece by digesting the words and deciding what it meant to our growth goals and our vision for an inspiring future...and that felt like freedom. Ideas for growth lived where there would normally be feelings of guilt and shame...
Have you ever experienced tense moments at work or home when people disagree, over- power, feel intimidated, defend, offend, prove people wrong, prove that they are right, get frustrated or angry and think, say and do things that are hurtful? Yes?!
So have I, and I have definitely contributed to these in different ways. That's why I developed the process below.
We had just finished Day 1 of our Ultimate Leadership Experience session at Le Nordik: a beautiful lodge where our clients come to be really present, to heighten awareness and develop courage and rock their business. At early evening, it was just as beautiful and inviting as it was during the day: the brightness of the wooden floors, reflected the light coming through the large windows.