As we work with leaders in various roles and types of organizations, one theme that we encounter across the leadership landscape is guilt. Leaders are often trapped by feelings of guilt. You can likely relate to experiences like this:
- You need to talk to a staff member about missing too much time at work, but you feel guilty because you know the staff member is going through a difficult time at home.
- You must address a performance issue with a team member who is failing to complete a project on time, but you think that you are at least partly to blame for not providing enough oversight and follow-up.
Guilt is debilitating. It traps us in ruts and is often at the root of unproductive behaviours that we call “spinning.” Symptoms of spinning include:
- Tracing and retracing the same set of circumstances over in your mind, searching for “the answer.”
- Replaying the story of what has occurred as a kind of penance.
- Procrastinating addressing a problem or challenge.
- Feeling fearful of taking action because you can’t predict the outcome.
Spinning is never productive. Repetitive and unfruitful internal conversations prevent us from having conversations with the person or people whom we really need to be talking to. Those conversations that we “NEED” to have are daunting only when we feel unsettled about our own responsibility in a situation or our skills of addressing it.
Stop spinning! Our Ultimate Leadership Experience provides leaders with concrete tools, skills, and PRACTICE to break through leadership barriers. Contact us to reserve your seat.